sanfran man

open you’re  heart to the city .
Listen for the fog horn.
See the big bridge.
Smell the seafood.
All the things that make the city great.
Clang Clang of the cable cars .
The bustle of union square.
Just don’t forget what got you here.
Hear the heart that beats .
That’s what got you here.
Enjoy the heart of the city.

I am

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The Deep End

Oh How I ve feared you Dark Water
The bottom gone from sight
Afraid of never coming up from the depths
Feeling the water close all around me
suffocating me
Watching others in jubilation successfully take the plunge
And me stuck …..
Putting a toe, a finger and half a leg
The rush, but also the trust from the plunge
Makes me more anxious being on the side
A simple invite “Come on in the water’s fantastic!”

I think long and hard.. But the resistance stays
The fight begins and so the resistance stays
I begin to breathe Yessssss Yessss Yesss

Slowly I relax and the mind melts away
I make my choice, I don’t look back

As the ground disappears beneath my feet and all that is left is dark
unknown water. I let go , embracing it, feeling it , saying yes to it.
Nothing has changed yet everything has

The Joy is Back.

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Losing The Experience

I want to calm my thoughts and Listen to the city
Breathe with the City, overhear party plans in Cantonese
Or a simple conversation about what to make for dinner
It all keeps my feet on the ground, to see with my eyes
not to just move to the next destination
Turning off the music Turning down my mind
and simply enjoying the day

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Making Neck Space

Trust has been thrown around in my life lately and with all the new places I am exploring with putting myself into the world it always comes back to that. Simply just saying yes to everything that happening instead of immediately thinking it’s not going to work out or that it was a bad idea in the first place. So much of my life has been working for others instead of working for what I want and once I start going after what, experiencing that journey has been the most fun I have had.
Going to the massage therapist for the first time this past Wednesday also really changed things when Theresa discovered I had a lot of stuck energy in my neck. It has always been a place in my body that is tense and it is hard for me to be fully relaxed for many reasons and one of them is Trust.  So after the session I started to breathe with my neck and keep this feeling going, this feeling that felt weird but continued to be a source for me to let go and then to express my new feelings.  I have always had trouble letting go of things and that’s why I get stuck in the first place in a job and get stuck not going after what I want which is to express my creativity.  I want to Trust enough to show the world who I am that I can be in a place where all the things I want can come to me if I let them. That can only happen if I ‘m open, Trust that it will happen and allow it to happen and get out of my own way!

So I love my new Neck and now I make space for new expressions not the old fear that expression has left because of Trust.

Love Always


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The Heave Hoe

A sweet little buttery something for the tip of the tongue

Put it on the end let it melt and slide down the back of the throat

The warming glowing warming glow as it nestles in

All tension leaves, the muscles let go, but the sensation remains

Growing in strength moving into the feet ( a slight tingle) into the legs (a slight jingle)

Rocking out in the most heavenly way …

Slowly but surely the feeling starts to leave sucking itself back in like an implosion

The muscles become tight The air is tense

Monday has started again

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Free Turn

I want something
Something that turns into a feeling
A feeling that turns into happiness
Happiness that turns into Family
Family that turns into siblings
Siblings that turn into adults
Adults that turn into Soldiers
Soldiers that turn into weapons
Weapons that turn into Destruction
Destruction that turns into Evolution
Evolution that turns into Knowledge
Knowledge that turns into Awareness
Awareness that turns into Spirit
Spirit that turns into Human

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The Magicians Heart

The Magicians Heart

The Going of the Mind
The Coming of the Soul
The Repeat of Mistakes 
The Reminder of the Goal
Jump into waters so deep so the bottom can’t be reached
Fill the air with Ideas till breath is impossible 
Always changing never searching
Let all the treasures come
Guard nothing Love Everything 
Drink in Joy

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